Archive for the ‘Warlock’ Category

For Gnomeregan!

Posted: 9 September, 2010 in Cataclysm, Warlock

Listen up, peons!  The Mighty Jingles here with news about how you can avoid service in the Salt Mines when I take over the world! (Terms and Conditions apply*)  I need a few good Gnomes to assist in the liberation of the glorious city of Gnomeregan from the clutches of the nefarious traitor Thermaplugg.  Only the bravest and best need apply, so no Mages, of course.

A few good gnomes...

Gentlemen, start your mechanostriders! Glory awaits!

Now THIS is what I'm talking about. Bring it, whiny mage bitches!

Death from above! Ice Block this, Mage scum!

By the sacred spanner of High Tinker Mekkatorque! That's one hell of a big bomb! Er.. Mage portal? Please?

Let it be known that The Mighty Jingles did not scurry away defeated, screaming like a little girl as certain Mage upstarts have claimed, he merely advanced in a different direction!  Thermaplugg’s day will come, for I am The Mighty Jingles!  I CANNOT BE DENIED!

I need YOU, to liberate Gnomeregan!

*Yeah, right!

That Takes Class!

Posted: 16 April, 2010 in Cataclysm, Druid, Mage, Warlock

I’ve been back for a few days now and had time to let the dust settle and mull over the news about the Cataclysm class reviews, which is pretty much what everyone’s talking about at the moment.  So without further ado, I’ll hand you over to our panel of experts for a class by class walkthrough of the forthcoming changes.  I’ll start off with the Mages.


What?  You need more? Sheesh.  Ok, we’re also getting the Flame Orb spell that Prince Taladaram’s so fond of, our very own Disco Inferno so we too can turn any raid or group into a Blue Oyster Bar.  A new fire-and-forget AoE damage dealer?  Yes please!  It’s possible that points in the fire tree are going to make this thing go BOOM when it reaches the end of its path, and that in combination with Flamestrike and Living Bombs on everything in sight with insta-cast Pyroblasts going off everywhere and massive Ignites ticking over just sort of made my eyes glaze over and I started to drool…


*cough*  Sorry.  Oh and there’s going to be some sort of new Frost Wall spell that slows people down and causes mild inconvenience and makes you forget where you put your pen and Zzzzzzzzz…..

Moving on swiftly, the Mastery bonuses!  Arcane is getting a pretty neat new mechanic where your spells do more damage based on how much mana you have.  I understand that mana pools are going to be nerfed across the board in Cataclysm, but still…  I have a mana pool that makes Holy Paladins feel defensive, so this should be an interesting mechanic.  The Fire Mastery bonus is a little boring on paper.  It looks pretty much like they’re removing Ignite as a talent and making it the Fire Mastery bonus instead.  Except bigger.  Much, bigger.  Like Ignite on steroids.  So..  boring on paper, but BIG numbers, which fits the Fire tree quite nicely since it’s all pretty much just about setting the entire world on fire and purging the wicked and righteous alike with the cleansing flames of destruction, then striding over the ashes like a God of Fiery Justice and…

*cough*  Sorry.  Did it again.  Oh yes, Mastery bonuses.  Frost gets Deathfrost!  Ooooh…  sounds scary, like FROST and DEATH at the same time!  What’s it do?  Glad you asked.  It makes casting Frostbolt give you a buff that increases the damage of all your spells… except Frostbolt.

Let me just boil that one down for you.  You put all your talents into the Frost tree, which buffs the damage of all your Frost spells, because it’s…  you know…  the Frost tree.  This gives you the Deathfrost mastery bonus, which increases the damage of all your spells except for the main nuke you cast to get the bonus and which all of your talents are designed to support.  But hey, all those spells you only bother casting when they proc for free because you’ve got exactly zero talents that boost them, they might not be so pitifully weak now.


Moving back to Arcane, one thing leaves me scratching my head in puzzlement.  Since Arcane Missiles are being removed and made into a proc-based attack that lights up whenever it feels like and which any spec can use (ohai, Deathfrost!), what exactly is the Arcane Rotation going to be?  Ok, what they describe for Missiles is pretty much the way Missile Barrage works now anyway, you spam Arcane Blast until Missile Barrage lights up and let it rip when you have four stacks of Blast.  But a lot’s going to depend on the proc rate.  At a guess I’d imagine that Arcane will have talents that boost the proc rate to more of less what it is now anyway (40%) and the other trees have a lower proc chance, say 15% or 20%.  I guess we’ll see.

So in a nutshell, Arcane is getting a neat new “I HAZ MOAR MANA AND MOAR PEW PEW HUUURRRR!!!” mechanic, Frost remains the “meh!” spec of choice and Fire is shaping up to be the spec you choose when you definitely, absolutely have to kill every last motherfucker in the room.

And we’re getting Heroism!  BWAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAA!  Yeah, fuck you, Warlocks!

Silence, puny Mage!  You will learn to fear your betters before I’m done with you!  For I am The Mighty Jingles!  I CANNOT BE DENIED!

Taking over the world and enslaving all sentient species is hard work, let me assure you.  Especially when the Mages start getting ideas above their station, which is why I’m especially happy with the Warlock class review since it takes all the good stuff the lesser spellcasting class gets, improves them and gives them to us!


Like Frostfire Bolt.  Nice spell, but in order to make it more evil and Warlocky, let’s make it do Shadowfire damage instead.  And make it refresh the duration of Immolate and Unstable Affliction too.  Oh and make it instant cast as well.  Now call it Fel Flame.  Finally, feast on all the tears of Frostfire Mages everywhere.  Muhahahahahaha!

While we’re on the subject, Focus Magic.  Curse you, Mage scum!  You never give me your Focus Magic and 3% crit buff!  Well we’ll just have to make our own.  Let’s call it Dark Intent, and anytime it procs we get a nice tasty damage buff.  And since it clearly needs to be better than anything those poxy Mages have, we’ll make it stack three times too!  Muuahahahahahaa!

And finally, those wierdo Demonologists are going to be able to merge their souls with their demons, gaining a burst cooldown that varies with which demon is active when it’s used.  It all sounds a bit perverted to me, but that’s Demonology for you.  Freaks!

The big news of course is that Soul Shards are finally getting an overhaul, they’re no longer going to be something that screws us when we don’t have any, but rather something that we can use for buffs when we do.  A number of our existing spells are going to be buffed rather dramatically when we consume a Soul Shard with them which beats the hell out of the existing mechanic where a number of our spells can’t be used at all if we don’t have shards.

Finally our Mastery bonuses are going to increase damage, increase damage and increase damage, in that order.  So, pretty boring, but all extra pew pew so no-one’s complaining.  So to summarise the most important point emerging from the Warlock class review:

Fuck you, Mages!  Here Warlocks, have a pony.


Ishnu A’lar, readers, Shinano here with the Druid class review news.  First, let’s take a look at all the new Resto spells.


Right, now we’ve covered those, onto…  wait, what?  Nothing?  Well to be fair, between Wild Growth, Nourish, Lifebloom, Rejuvenation, Swiftmend, Natures Swiftness, Healing Touch and Regrowth, we Trees really don’t need yet another heal in our arsenal.  Regrowth is getting a buff with a critical Regrowth heal causing a bed of healing goodness to sprout at the feet of whoever it hit for an additional HoT, which is pretty neat.  Cat and Bear on the other hand could use a little more depth and utility, so that’s exactly what they’re getting.

Thrash is an AoE bleed effect, and various talents are going to increase damage done to bleeding targets.  In addition, Bears are getting a group burst movement spell (Stampeding Roar) and both Cats and Bears are going to finally get a spell interrupt off the Global Cooldown.  Changes to Mangle and Savage Roar are going to make Cat dps priorities a little more forgiving and Bears, in common with all tanks, are getting Vengeance, a Mastery bonus which scales their attack power with damage taken.  This is actually a pretty nice idea, given how tank threat scales poorly compared to dps at higher gear levels.

Meanwhile, the Boomkin are receiving Wild Mushroom, which is pretty much an instant cast, no cooldown Proximity Mine.  Eclipse is becoming the Boomkin Mastery ability, which buffs Arcane or Nature damage related to how heavily you’re casting Arcane or Nature spells.   While we’re on the subject of Mastery bonuses, the Resto bonus will be HoT scaling, which increases the power of your HoTs relative to how badly wounded your target is, and Cats are going to see increased Bleed damage.  All well and good.

Which brings us onto the Elephant in the room.  Tree of Life becoming a cooldown-based ability.


Blizzard argue that shifting into Tree of Life should provide a buff to our healing that it currently doesn’t, and if they buffed healing while in Tree without giving it a cooldown then we’d be an overpowered healing class.  Therefore, they say, in order to give Tree of Life any point other than the merely cosmetic it needs to provide some sort of buff to healing and that therefore needs to be on a cooldown to avoid being overpowered.  A good argument, allow me to retort.


Going into slightly more depth, let’s just look at that tooltip in slightly greater detail.  Tree of Life:

Reduces the mana cost of your healing over time spells by 20% and grants the ability to shapeshift into the Tree of Life. While in this form you increase healing received by 6% for all party and raid members within 100 yards, and you can only cast Restoration spells in addition to Innervate, Barkskin, Nature’s Grasp and Thorns spells.

20% reduction on mana costs for HoTs and 6% more healing for everyone? I’m not entirely sure what Blizzard define as a buff to healing, but if that isn’t one then I’m playing the wrong spec.  Oh but there’s more, let’s take a look at Improved Tree of Life:

Increases your armor contribution from items while in Tree of Life Form by 133%, and increases your healing spell power by 10% of your spirit while in Tree of Life Form.

Call me a bluff old traditionalist but if it looks like a buff to healing, smells like a buff to healing and acts like a buff to healing, I’m going to go ahead and just call it a buff to healing.  I’m old fashioned like that.  If they make Tree of Life a cooldown they’re going to have to buff the healing done by normal Night Elf form by something like 10% at least, as well as reduce the mana cost of every one of our HoTs by 20% in order for this change to not be a nerf to us when we’re not in Tree form!

Now, I’m sure that they’re probably planning to do exactly that, but that begs the question WHY?  It’s not broken, you don’t need to break it in order to fix it!  And quite apart from anything else, I just so happen to love my “purely cosmetic” (even though it categorically isn’t!) Tree of Life!  I’m a druid, I shapeshift, therefore I am.  It’s what I do!

Well, they’ve stated that they might add a minor glyph that allows us to retain the form of Tree of Life without the functionality that the cooldown (whatever it ends up actually doing) allows, and until I see something concrete about that, I’m with Keeva!

Hands off our Trees!

More Class Review goodness to follow…

Well it’s been an interesting week.  I post about how Onyxia was such a great raid and Blizzard announce that they’re bringing the old girl back for patch 3.2.2.   I post about how old Azeroth had some great lore and instances and news breaks (spoiler alert!) that the next expansion would totally revamp Azeroth and bring up to date those old instances and zones we loved so much, as well as allow us to fly in the Old World at last.  Still no sign of the Blood Elf groupies or that 50,000 gold though!  But enough about my amazing powers of clairvoyance, I’ve been back for a week, what have I been up to?

The Mighty jingles, Now Even Mightier Than Before!


It is I! The Mighty Jingles!

Greetings, peasants!  It is I, The Mighty Jingles!  I CANNOT BE DENIED! My evil plan to take over the world has been progressing well.  Several Titans and an Old God have now been removed from the picture and no longer threaten my schemes.  Soon, I will be in a position to have my revenge against all life on Azeroth!  Let’s just go through the list, shall we?  Sitting uncomfortably?  Then we’ll begin!  Get some popcorn, this will take a while.


Phew!  As you can see, it’s hard damn work being an evil genius.  The world doesn’t take over itself, you know?  Infuriatingly, complete global domination was not achieved this weekend as my plans were thwarted at the last minute by this pesky interfering…  uh..  well…  not quite sure what he is to be honest.  He only stuck around for an hour though, scared of me, obviously.

I'll get you next time, my pretty!

I'll get you next time, my pretty!

But enough idle chatter!  I am always on the lookout for a few useful minions, if you think you have what it takes to be part of a successful team, want to travel the world, meet interesting new people and enslave them, then you could be the kind of minion I need!

I need YOU, to take over the world!

I need YOU, to take over the world!

Jingles’ Big Adventure

Posted: 12 April, 2009 in misc, Warlock

Once upon a time, there was a handsome young gnome named Jingles.  Jingles was a small gnome with big ambitions.  It was Jingles’ ambition to take over the world, send all the males to work in the Salt Mines and all the women to his harem.  But first, Jingles was going to have to gain enough power to make sure that those few foolish enough to object to his master plan could be squished as an example to the others.  So Jingles became a Warlock.


Amazingly, this in itself wasn’t enough to achieve world domination.  Muttering under his breath about warlock nerfs, Jingles set off to Northrend to seek his fortune.


He met lots of interesting people, and while certain mages might want you to believe that he pooped his pants, Jingles was obviously only acting scared of the Lich, Kel’zan, in order to lull him into a false sense of security.  Yeah, that’s it.


The one thing Jingles noticed about transportation in Northrend…

Is that while the methods and modes are rich and varied..


They’re all uniformly unreliable!


So if you absolutely, definitely have to get around in Northrend, get a Magnificent Flying Carpet.  It’s a very fast Rug!


In Sholozar Basin, Jingles met a very strange gnomish couple.  The husband seemed relatively normal…


But there was something odd about his wife that Jingles couldn’t quite put his finger on…


Clearly, Hemet Nesingwary knows talent when he sees it.  The Mighty Jingles will allow him to have Sundays off from the Salt Mines when he takes over the world.


And these three Dwarves owe him BIG favours!


Accepting the inevitable, Thorim the Stormlord bowed down before his new Master.


But Darkrider Arly played hard to get.  The little minx!  She will be mine, oh yes!


And before very long, The Mighty Jingles reached the pinnacle of his powers (and level 80) and the road to world domination was complete.  If all males could please report to Thorim for your Salt Mine labour allocation, and females report to Darkrider Arly for your nightgown fitting, that would be lovely.  Thanks.


Well I finally managed to get some toons onto the EU Public Test Realm, and while I realise this is all subject to change, I’m cautiously optimistic.  Allow me to explain.

We’ve been farming Brutallus in Sunwell Plateau for some time now.  I say “farming” him rather than saying he’s “on farm” since he’s anything but an easy fight.  When I came back to the game we’d downed him maybe twice, and I arrived back in the raid wearing Tier 5 gear.  It goes without saying that I was seriously undergeared for Sunwell, the other mages all had their 4 piece Tier 6 bonus, I didn’t even have a single piece and only had one BT-level ring that compared to their gear.  Luckily, it didn’t take long for me to get close to their gear level and within a  month I was sporting 4 pieces of my own Tier 6 with the gaps made up from badge loot and Zul’Aman gear.

But I still struggled to match their dps.  Well to cut a long story short, despite conflicting advice on the Elitist Jerks forums about the relative value of spell haste, I’m convinced that haste is the way to go.  The other mages had massive amounts of haste and lower hit and crit rating than me, and once I re-gemmed for haste I finally managed to get 1950 dps on Brtuallus.  Not as good as some, but enough to justifiy my raid spot.  It’s obviously not as simple as that alone, the group you’re in makes a HUGE difference to a mage, but this post isn’t about me improving dps on one fight, it’s about the new talent changes in the upcoming patch.

On the Test Realms last week, unbuffed, ungrouped and with sub-optimal enchants (+40 dmg rather than Soulfrost) I managed 2050 dps as a Frost Mage on Doctor Boom.  Compare that to a fully raid-buffed Fire Mage with the best group setup and all consumables getting 1950 dps. 

Impressed with the new Frost Talents yet?  I was. 

Arcane on the other hand, just seemed a bit “meh”.  In the same setup the best I could do was 1100dps.  Now I accept that you can’t expect to get the most from a new spec straight after visiting the trainer.  I also accept that it’s entirely possible I was using the wrong rotations or the wrong spell as my “filler” between Arcane Blasts (I was using Frostbolts).  Perhaps I should even have been using Arcane Barrage instead of Blast around my filler spells.  All of this may be true, but even so, 1k dps vs 2k dps seems like it can’t be explained by crappy rotations alone.  If there are any other Arcane Mages out there with a different experience, please feel free to point out what I’m doing wrong because I really, really want to like Arcane.

As for Fire, well I ran into a little problem testing Fire, in that I can’t get onto the PTR lately.  I did have a play around with Fire, but didn’t do any comprehensive testing.  Fire feels ok, but I’d like to do some dps tests to see exactly how it stacks up against Frost.

Meanwhile, The Mighty Jingles had a play around with Affliction.  I was just messing around, not doing any serious testing, but Affliction sure is complicated now!  It seems like you’re fighting your cooldowns rather than the mobs.  There are some nice talents in there, but some can be counterproductive, like your Shadowbolts resetting the timer on your Corruption, for example.  Sounds great on paper, but unless you time your Shadowbolts precisely you can end up resetting too early and losing DoT ticks.  It can actually lower your dps!  There’s just too much cooldown juggling going on there to be comfortable in my opinion.

Aluriel also popped over to the Test Realms and was immediately critted in the face by a wall of confusion.  Don’t get me wrong, the new Priest talents are lovely in my humble opinion, they’re not the issue.  Aluriel’s problem is that she doesn’t know what to wear!  Some of her healing gear seems like it would be better for dps, and some of her dps gear looks like it would be better for healing!  This is what I believe is referred to as “an embarrasment of riches”.  It’s quite a nice problem to have so I’m not complaining.  As far as the dreaded spell downranking nerf is concerned, Priests are better off than most in this department.  With the proper talents we can regain mana from overhealing, we can gain clearcasting at an increased rate and our Shadowfiends benefit immensely from the shared spellpower mechanic.  We can also, in a pinch, use the neglected max rank “Heal” rather than Greater Heal, which in Aluriel’s case, still heals for a reasonable 2k.  I’m pretty happy with the direction Priests are going, all in all.

After hearing good things about Protection Warriors I took the plunge and transferred Gorn over to the PTR too.  All of the rumours are true.  Protection is FUN!  In a mixture of Kara/Tier 4 epics and blue quest and reputation reward tanking gear, Gorn was storming through the Quel’danas dailies like a man possessed.  Shield Slams were critting for 2k,and they were critting regularly, as were Heroic Strikes and Devastates.  I’m not saying he’s anywhere near Calli’s dps, because he clearly isn’t, but grinding as a Protection spec warrior isn’t an exercise in having your teeth pulled anymore.  I’m predicting a happy, fun-filled future for tanks.  Oh, and Shockwave?  I want to marry it and have its babies.